Season 3
Episode Guide
Elka's Choice Part 2
S3
E1
After her presumed-dead husband comes back into her life, Elka runs away with him, as Victoria exploits her bogus same-sex marriage to Joy for publicity.
Beards
S3
E2
On a gay cruise, Victoria and Joy continue the charade that they are married, while Melanie runs into her sister and her girlfriend.
Funeral Crashers
S3
E3
When the dry cleaners misdeliver her favorite dress to a woman who then dies, Melanie crashes the funeral with Victoria, Joy and Elka to retrieve it undetected.
Happy Fat
S3
E4
Melanie, Victoria and Joy put their Midwestern neighbors on an L.A. weight-loss regimen, while Elka lies about her age to keep up with spontaneous thrill-seeker Roy.
One Thing Or A Mother
S3
E5
Victoria dates a hand model, Roy's mother dislikes Elka, Joy can't figure out the age of the guy she's seeing, and Melanie's boyfriend resembles Winnie-the-Pooh.
How Did You Guys Meet, Anyway?
S3
E6
Waiting to use the women's restroom at a Browns game, Melanie, Victoria and Joy recount to Elka how they all originally met on a Beverly Hill's hotel rooftop in the 80s.
Two Girls and a Rhino
S3
E7
Elka and Joy spend three days in a zoo habitat to save a rhino species on the edge of extinction, and Melanie and Victoria date two men with vastly different occupations.
God and Football
S3
E8
Melanie dates the Browns' dim-witted kicker, Victoria emerges from a near-death experience believing Elka is God, and Joy struggles to give up her vices.
Love Is Blind
S3
E9
Victoria's daughter Emmy and Melanie's son Will break the news that they're engaged to each other, and Joy dates a 22-year-old who literally can't see her actual age.
Life With Lucci
S3
E10
When "All My Children" is cancelled, Susan Lucci shows up at the house hoping that Victoria will be sympathetic, only for Victoria to be suspicious of her true intentions.
I'm With The Band
S3
E11
To make Johnny jealous, Victoria throws herself at his alcoholic ex-bandmate, while Melanie makes out with a man whom she thinks is the lead singer of the band Bread.
Lost Loves Part 1
S3
E12
As Victoria reunites with her first ex-husband, Melanie goes after her high school crush, Joy tries to meet up with her ex-fiancee Kyle, and Elka gets back together with Max.
Tangled Web Part 2
S3
E13
At Max's lake house, Melanie finds out the new man in her life is actually Joy's ex-fiance Kyle, and a spider with paralyzing effects runs rampant.
Hot & Heavy
S3
E14
Joy's former beau Colin and Victoria both go undercover in fat suits to vie for a local news award, and Melanie accidentally finds herself in a Sexaholics Anonymous meeting.
Rubber Ball
S3
E15
To get into an exclusive country club, the women attend a charity event, where Elka plots revenge on a high-ranking member who fired her there in 1947.
Everything Goes Better With Vampires
S3
E16
The women get stuck in the house with their lazy maid, Elka's friend Mamie Sue, a Rick Springfield doppelganger and an obnoxious intellectual.
Claus, Tails & High-Pitched Males: Birthdates 3
S3
E17
On their annual day to fix each other up, the women date a former priest, Santa, a guy with a high voice and the captain from the gay cruise they went on.
Cruel Shoes
S3
E18
Victoria unveils her line of shoes during Cleveland's fashion week, and Joy falls for George, a witty, upbeat man with only a few months left to live.
Bye George, I Think He's Got It!
S3
E19
Elka sees her twin sister for the first time in forty years, and Joy agrees to marry George, knowing she won't have to tolerate his idiosyncrasies for long.
The Gateway Friend
S3
E20
Melanie, Victoria and Joy are desperate to get their friend back together with a doctor to continue getting their Botox treatments.
Some Like It Hot
S3
E21
The cast and crew of Hot in Cleveland break down how the show comes together throughout the week, from the table read to rehearsals to shooting in front of a live audience.
Storage Wars
S3
E22
Victoria hopes an unearthed Lincoln letter will distract from her Mrs. Ladypants commercial airing in the U.S., while Joy exaggerates her breast size over CB radio.
What's Behind the Door?
S3
E23
Victoria gets her soap opera creator and costar onboard to resurrect the show as an app, with blatant product placements.
Blow Outs
S3
E24
After their selfish behavior creates a rift between hairdressers Christopher and Pierre, the women have had enough of living with each other.